Mommies need to stick together before we all fall apart!

I have had a bad few weeks. Anyone who keeps up on Facebook or has seen me in person already knows that. My dear, sweet, wonderful son Samuel spent about three weeks waking me every night around 2 (sometimes earlier, rarely later) and somehow we didn't manage to get back to sleep until around 5. At five up here in the north, the sun is coming up and by 5:30 it is full daylight. So going back to sleep at 5 is not fun. I was only getting 3-4 hours of sleep a night. This for my two-year-old. And no one to take a night for me or let me sleep in one morning. Needless to say, I was exhausted. Completely worn out physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually. Funny how sleep affects every single part of your life. Nothing was getting done except the bare minimum and that only getting half done. We've been dressing from the dryer and setting the table from the dishwasher for a while now! Not only was I worn out, I was getting pretty whiny about it. And I hate to be whiny. I hate to admit defeat but I was there.

Thankfully on Monday Sam started sleeping again. I promptly came down with a sinus headache for four days but that is starting to go away. I've gotten to sleep for three nights now (although we were up at 5:30 this morning -ugh!) I feel like a whole different person than I did three days ago. Still tired? You bet! Way behind in every part of my life? Sure thing! Overwhelmed by what needs to be done? Yep! Still want to whine about it a little? Of course!

I was resting yesterday - still taking the opportunity to rest when I can- and watching Nanny 911 on CMT. (I have to say I can't figure out why CMT thinks showing a week of Nanny 911 honors Mother's Day, but I was watching it!) There was a lady with three little ones under 4 whose husband was deployed. My heart went out to this lady struggling through what we all know to be so hard with little help. Then in the last couple of days I have heard from two younger mamas of their first babies who are struggling. Worn out. Lonely. Just want to go to the bathroom by themselves. Or sleep all night. Or do something when the mood strikes them. Or have two hands free.

What we do is hard Mommies!! Why do we feel like we don't want to admit that to anyone else? Why are we so tough on ourselves? Sometimes it sucks! Sometimes I know that the next time someone yells "Mommy!" I'm going to scream! Yes, I do feel like locking the bathroom door just to get a few minutes of privacy! I do fondly remember my days before kids! I do dream of sending them off to college! Or at least to school! (God bless the homeschoolers!) Or of giving them some magic potion to make them sleep for 24 hours so I can sleep! You know what? It's ok. It's ok to feel that way. It's ok to say it. Share it with the struggling moms around you. Even if your kids are at college or past, let them know about the times you felt that way. I was so thankful for a lovely lady with kids in high school when Gabby was a baby that said she remembered being overwhelmed by all the little socks in the laundry and thought she just couldn't deal with another one. Made me feel like I wasn't crazy for feeling the same way. Stand by your fellow Mommies this Mother's Day weekend. We have to stick together or we will all fall apart!

By the way, this was really hard for me to post. I'm still being hard on myself. I do, however, love my kids like crazy. Of course right now one is sleeping and the other is at school - LOL!